Movin' On Up!

Hi all!! So I my life has bee crazy and busy and tiring. These workouts are really kicking my ass and I have to admit- I am ready to film this bad boy. Let's go... come on!!!! I have been going to Slimmons, on average, 4X a week. And, while I LOVE it- I am bloody tired. I want some of my freedom back. Not to say I am going to stop going there, or working out all together- that will NOT happen- no, I just want to be at home after a 10 hour day in the office and walk and play with my dog and not be driving into Beverly Hills.

So... moral of the story- I am tired.

However, this brings me to the main point of this blog, and that is "counting my blessings" (something Richard says all the time). I have to remind myself how amazing my life is. It is far from perfect, but it is mine and it is great. I smile, I laugh, I love, I get angry, and sad, and hysterical and it is all wonderful. Thanks goodness I allow myself to feel these feelings.

This is something about me that I have come to appreciate more and more (and I see it now more than ever before). I have never allowed my weight to stop me from anything in this life. I might have been more hesitant with men, or not sat in the front row at a comedy show for fear of being picked on (true story)... but I have never let it stop me. I get out there- I see things, I meet people, I make friends and laughter and conversation! How truly blessed am I to be able to say this is true.

I bring this up because some people have said some things to me about being "too happy" before I lost weight (in context it makes some sense. No hurt feelings- it's hollywood). Well who wrote the book that said fat people are supposed to be socially awkward and sad?!?! I would like to know... and then I would like to prove them wrong by laughing at their skinny asses! For serious folks! 

The thing is, I really do think that you choose how you will feel. Some circumstances might not apply... but, really, if we let our environment rule our nature and determine our attitude and self worth than none of us would be happy! Everyone gets picked on... even the prettiest people. Everyone has insecurities... so being overweight should never stop anyone from doing anything. When we crawl in a hole and cry and stop what we want in this life, stop our dreams, than we are giving all of these meaningless people power. And who the fuck are they?!?

Choose to be happy. Choose to be confident.

I remember Kristen told me a long time ago, "If I didn't know you so well I would never know you were insecure. You seem so confident" and to that I said... " I fake it"! That's what I do folks... in this life we have to fake it until we make it!! It's so true... and eventually I start to believe some of the nice things I say about myself. Because talking bad about myself and self doubt is never going to get me anywhere in this life. It would be a never ending cycle of sadness. So... I have chosen to be happy- or at the very least, try!

I am getting off of my soapbox... I just want everyone to know what I think- OF COURSE. We choose our destiny. Don't let anything stop you, don't let anyone make that choice for you.

Lol... enough of that- you can tell it's been on my mind.

In other news- I have officially, as of this morning, lost 30lbs!!! I couldn't be more happy with my progress! The next number I can't wait to get to is 50--- what a feet that will be :):):)

I seem to be looking forward to more challenges ahead in this journey. I have decided to run a half marathon- not sure which one yet... but I am going to find a cause that is dear to my heart. I think by finding things that are fun and challenging I will keep up this weight loss and be in fighting shape (I want to take boxing lessons at some point).

So all is great... I am (still) happy and healthier and motivated- oh, and tired. :)

I love, love, love you all!